Honestly I have no idea where to start my head is completely a mess. I have so many thoughts going in so many different directions. You mean so much to me, you always have. From the first time that we were together I knew that you were going to be a huge impact in my life, and you were/are. You’re without a doubt the most important thing in my life, you still are. I have never felt the way I feel with you with anybody else. In high school I thought love was a word that you say when you and your boyfriend are getting serious. I was obviously wrong. Love is when you can’t eat, can’t sleep and can’t breathe until you know you’re going to see that special someone again, It’s when you know that your life sucks so much less when you’re around that person. Love is knowing that when you’re with that person nothing and no one else matters, like you’re in your own world and you don’t care who’s watching. Love is not a word you throw around, when you love someone, love that person with all your heart, love them like no one else is watching, Love them and never let go. But also in love people make mistakes, people are not perfect they tend to make horrible decisions. Just because people make mistakes doesn’t make them bad people. They just had a moment of poor judgement. Anything is forgivable, if you let it be. When you love someone with your whole heart you are understanding not judgmental but caring. When you love someone with your whole heart you do not leave them when times are tough, you stick with them until the end, until you have no more love left. But that’s the trick when you leave someone and you have no love left that proves that you hardly loved them to begin with. I love you, more than anything. I put your life before my own. But I made a terrible mistake and that doesn’t make me a horrible person, it makes me a normal person. EVERYONE makes mistakes, that doesn’t mean that the same people are going to make the same mistakes because you can’t tell the future, nobody knows what’s going to happen in the future. That’s why you have to live in the now. Live how you want to live and be with who you want to be with. If you have to think for a second do I love this person? Then YOU DON’T LOVE THEM!! If you know you love that person, be with them. What’s holding you back? If you love her and she loves you go for it! I love you, and I want to be with you, forever. I know that what I did was terrible and I know that I cannot take it back but if I could, baby, I would. You and I both know that. I have never once in a relationship talked about love, ever! But with you, that’s all I think about. I don’t think I want to be with you for the rest of my life I know that I want to be with you for the rest of my life. You’re the only reason I get up in the morning. You’re the reason I am who I am today. I have improved my life so much in these past 10 months, for, and because of you. I was always the type of person to never change for a boy, but I did change. I was always the person to put my friends before my relationship but you are my relationship and my best friend. I have learned to appreciate life more, and respect myself more, because of you. I know that you won’t trust me for a long time, but I’m okay with that if I know that one day I can prove to you that I am a new person, a changed person. I need you in my life. You’re the first person I think about when I wake up and the only person I think about when I go to sleep. If you can’t be with me, let me know, let me try and move on. It’s going to be tough but I can’t bare to spend one more minute away from you. We have been through so much together, too much to give up. We have so many memories made together. You’re the first person I shot a gun with, you’re the first guy I went fishing with and as much as I say I hate it, I don’t I’m glad I’m with you doing the thing you love to do the most. We’ve been on vacation together, and gone to the beach, You’re the only boy I’ve ever wanted to go on vacation with, you’re the only person who has gotten me hooked on country music you’re the only boy I’ve been camping with, you’re the only boy I’ve ever cared about like this. You’re the first relationship I’ve taken seriously and you’re gonna be the last boy I ever fall in love with. I am so sorry for what I’ve done to you and to us but I want to work through this, together. I want to be there for you always, no matter what. I want to show you how much love I have for you and how my love for you will never fade. I want to spend this Christmas with you and every Christmas to come. I want to kiss you at 12:00 on January 1st. I want to spend your 21st birthday with you. I want to be with you forever, I want a family and a house with you, I want to move away with you to where ever life takes us. I want to be with you until the end of time. I hope you know that I would never do this to you again I never want to see you like this ever again, I never want you to feel this much pain ever again. Patrick you’re the only guy for me. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am so happy I met you, you’re my everything. I want nothing more than to cuddle with you and watch Hawaii Five-O or CSI I would do anything to hear “do do do do do do” I would do anything to see you, and be with you again. if you give me another chance I will show you how amazing I will be to you, I will be the best girl friend in the entire world. You’re my soul mate Pat, my dream come true. I just need to be with you.